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幽默英語英語笑你的肚子

時(shí)間:2020-11-06 19:31:52 英語笑話 我要投稿

幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子

  幽默的人不僅僅會(huì)說笑話,還要懂得他人說的笑話,來測(cè)試一下你的幽默細(xì)胞的.指數(shù)有多高吧!

幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子

  幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子篇一:THE TALKING PARROTS

  A lady approaches her priest and tells him "Father, I have a problem. I have two female talking parrots, but they only know how to say one thing."

  "What do they say?" the priest inquired.

  "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Want to have some fun?'"

  "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots whom I taught to pray and read the bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn the joys of praise and worship."

  "Thank you!" the woman responded.

  The next day the woman brings her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots are holding the rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her two female parrots in with the male parrots and the female parrots say "Hi we're prostitutes, want to have some fun?"

  One male parrot looks over at the other male parrot and exclaims, "Put the beads away, brother. Our prayers have been answered!"

  幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子篇二:Locked Car

  A blonde woman is driving down the road. She notices that she's low on gas, so she stops at a gas station. While she's pumping her gas, she notices that she locked the keys in the car. So when she goes inside to pay, she asks the attendant for a hanger so that she can attempt to open the door herself.

  She returns outside and begins to jimmy the lock. Ten minutes later, the attendant comes out to see how the blonde is faring.

  Outside the car, the blonde is moving the hanger around and around while the blonde inside the car is saying, "A little more to the left...a little more to the right!..."

  幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子篇三:Blonde Logic

  A blonde and her brunette friend were talking, when the blonde said, "I hate all the blonde jokes people tell."

  "Oh, they are only jokes. There are a lot of stupid people out there. Here, I'll prove it to you."

  They went outside and hailed a taxi driver.

  "Please take me to 29 Nickel Street to see if I'm home," said the brunette.

  The taxi drove them to Nickel Street, and when they finally got out, the brunette looked at the blonde and said, "See! That guy was really stupid."

  "No kidding," replied the blonde. "There was a pay phone just around the corner. You could have called instead."

  幽默英語英語大全笑你的肚子篇四:Ringing Bells

  A FIREMAN came home from work one day and told his wife, "You know, we have a wonderful system at the fire station: BELL 1 rings and we all put on our jackets, BELL 2 rings and we all slide down the pole, BELL 3 rings and we're on the fire truck ready to go.

  "From now on when I say BELL 1, I want you to strip naked. When say BELL 2, I want you to jump in bed. And when I say BELL 3, we are going to make love all night." The next night he came home from work and yelled, "BELL 1!" The wife promptly took all her clothes off.

  When he yelled "BELL 2!", the wife jumped into bed. When he yelled "BELL 3!", they began making love. After a few minutes the wife yelled "BELL 4!" "What the hell is BELL 4?" asked the husband?

  "ROLL OUT MORE HOSE," she replied, "YOU'RE NOWHERE NEAR THE FIRE."

  


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